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I was in the same boat but it started for me with facemask mandates. After a brutal rape where my nose and mouth was held against a pillow until I passed out, I can NOT wear anything which covers my nose for longer than I can hold my breath. I begin hyperventilating and pass out. And facemask use was brutally enforced in Thailand during most of 2021, to the point where there were calls for deportation of farang who flouted the rules (which required you to wear one at all times in public, even while driving a car/motorbike). So I could barely leave the land, with the added bonus that if I had needed any type of medical care under any circumstances whatsoever, I would have to forgo it. If I broke my leg in a motorbike accident say I was going to be staying at home splinting it myself with a few bottles of whiskey to ease the pain. I found it so sad when there were calls to deny medical care to the unvaccinated as I already could not get any. It's only been very recently that I could get medical care!

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All for our health and well-being to be sure!

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Medical care is a human right, don't you know... ;-)

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May 26, 2023·edited May 26, 2023

Guess the Pittsburgh VA hospital did not get the memo.

Masking is still required for veterans or entry and medical care is denied.

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It's horrible to like what you are saying. It's horrible that this ever happened at all..

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Yes, I know what you mean. And I’m sorry to read what you went through— must have been terrible. Stay strong!

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It was terrible for all of us on so many levels. Thank you for this post it is at least a beginning of counting the costs...

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I am so sorry you had to go through that.

The way I was ( and still am) ostracized for choosing not to be injected brought me back to when I was around 15 and I was sexually assaulted by a friends dad who I spoke out against publicly. Instead of the community holding that bastard to account I was blamed and shunned, even by my own family. Its a miracle I survived.

So this shit show has brought up a lot of trauma for me too. Our society cam be so deeply dysfunctional.

I do now what I did then to survive and heal, i lose myself in the beauty of music and nature.

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I try to do likewise. I have no doubt that there are more in this situation than they say. Sexual abuse victims were traumatized and victimized all over again

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May 26, 2023Liked by John Botica

The Pittsburgh VA hospital still requires masks...or entry and medical care is denied.

In some of my previous posts on various Substacks, I had written, "imagine being a woman or man who was sexually assaulted and their attacker put his hands over the mouth to silence them. Does forcing someone to wear a mask make a person relieve the trauma?"

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It sure did force me to relive the trauma! The nightmares came back with a vengeance and I spent many nights terrified about things like visiting immigration or what if they arrested me or I had some medical emergency and was unconscious? It was unconscionable....

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May 30, 2023Liked by John Botica

Any what is the sentiment in Thailand there now following what, by all accounts, the vaccine injury of the princess. Has that changed anything?

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I can't mask for the same reason. Was fairly lucky where I live in the US was able to flout the mandate at many places. Didn't shop at trader Joe's or guitar center though for a couple years.

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Glad you made it through okay! I did the best I could on a loop between some Thai cops in Thalang and Nai Yang who I knew would look the other way and a few symptathetic shop owners including one whose son is autistic. But venturing out of that short distance was terrifying to me

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May 26, 2023Liked by John Botica

Agreed, but for some reason I feel more prepared to resist this time. Last time I think a lot of it was just pure shock that the world had gone collectively insane within the span of a few months.

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May 26, 2023·edited May 26, 2023Liked by John Botica

This was exactly my experience for all of 2021. The worst part was that at the time, it was not clear at all that any this would ever end. I was afraid that if I lost my job I'd never be allowed to work in my industry again. I thought I might never be allowed to sit inside a restaurant or attend a concert again. This was a huge psychological weight that I carried with me for a long time.

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May 26, 2023·edited May 26, 2023Author

It hasn't ended yet. It's merely in an interim phase. There's much more to come.

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It's not over.

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Hi John. You have a great many compatriots around the world who agree with you and are happy you are here. These are darkest times as you relate. It is really backbreakingly mentally & emotionally tough. Maybe not quite as hard as it was forAnne Frank - but very close. PLEASE keep writing and stay connected. Those of us who do understand are the saving grace.

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Thanks KW! And please be sure to keep at it yourself also! I always enjoy reading your thoughts-- and the thought provoking topics you bring to the table.

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May 26, 2023Liked by John Botica

We are in a whole new tribe but I don't know how young people are going to ever experience a life outside the digital cage. At least we have our memories of freedom. Keep going - I'm reading all of George Orwell's books, pre and post war. It's a good mental preparation for the future.

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Make sure you have paper books. E-books can disappear in a flash.

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May 26, 2023Liked by John Botica

Holy cow!!! My life too! Destroyed by the FAKE SHIT ROLLING DOWN ON US LIKE A BULLDOZER taking out everything in its path. Unfortunately in NYS Hockel and her ilk are still destroying everything they can. It’s dangerous here and we may have to leave.

But I am grateful to God the Creator because my immediate family are all unvaccinated. And every day I wake up I remind myself of the fact that at least we have the chance to start life again without the real possibility of dropping dead at any moment. THAT IS THE LIVING NIGHTMARE. I truly do feel sorry for people because in their pompous attitude toward us as being the enemy and the government or doctor or media gave them the chance to call us all THE ENEMY, well now the tide has really turned against them. We will be the future--- they unfortunately will not.

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May 26, 2023Liked by John Botica

You sound like a DETERMINED, RELENTLESS SEEKER OF TRUTH, not the generic 'unhappy'. Big difference.

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I don't know if you are a Christian, but it was written over and over and over that the followers of Christ will be persecuted and thrown out of society. Even beheaded (although we are still at the be-clowning stage). For those who see the transhumanist nightmare (of other beliefs or no beliefs at all), we who believe that staying 100% human will have to be the hill we die on. It's easier for Christians because it is in our sacred tests, but the drive to remain human will have to conquer every force thrown at you. God Bless you John.

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Yes, they’re absolutely out to kill the Christ in everyone. A lot of us have seen that video of Bill Gates giving a lecture on the need to kill the “God gene”…. there’s nothing more Billy Boy Gates would like, than to make each and every one of us in his own soulless image. Of course he’d much prefer us all dead… but that’s another story.

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Agreed, agreed. This is not just about transhumanism or a type totalitarian medical compliance but it is ultimately targeted at Christ's followers (Yeshua Messiah). Its end goal is to corral and ghettoize radical Christian belief and then the Satanists would like to to eradicate the Christian as we are 'haters of mankind' as the Roman Caesars pontificated on. CV and the CVxx proved that the church was vulnerable to disinformation agenda on a massive scale due to lack of discernment and placing complete trust in our institutions and media. the true Christian church is small and ultimately are resisters of the radical secular progressivism/communism. We are in the end stage. But our hope is Christ's return and rapture of the church and we get to watch from the balcony. Recommend listening to two pastors JD Faraq and Brandon Holthaus who both talk about these issues on a regular basis.

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I'll be writing about these issues soon. Stay tuned!

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May 26, 2023Liked by John Botica

I'm unhappy because I realized my government wants me dead.

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John,

You have retained the most important thing: your personal integrity. What good is it for a person to get everything, but losing themselves to lies?...

Walking through the darkness is the only path to the light. It's not fun. I have also been told to be more optimistic so many times that a few days ago, I wrote the following:

https://rayhorvaththesource.substack.com/p/people-are-telling-me-to-tell-them

It was a hit.

The next day, I posted a poll asking my readers if they prefer me to always say something "positive" or let them decide what to think instead. Those who preferred to be left alone outnumbered the ones who wanted something good in each of my articles by four to one:

https://rayhorvaththesource.substack.com/p/this-is-what-ive-learnt-from-you

If you can make sense of that, please, let me know. :)

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I think generally, people want the truth, warts and all! That is of course, excluding those who've just received their 5th or 6th booster.... now they're not in any particular hurry for hearing anything resembling the truth. And for good reason too!

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In my experience, people are often more interested in "being right" than in the truth. They are more than willing to lie to themselves and to everyone around only to stay in control and to come out "winning." The truth is usually inconvenient and unprofitable, so it makes sense only for those who are able and willing to take a perspective that is larger than instant gratification. Life experience, benevolence, and a certain level of mental capacity are also necessary for being able to handle the truth (at least as much of it as is possible to comprehend), which further limits the number of feasible candidates...

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The question posed also inspired me to write a bit more in an article today:

https://rayhorvaththesource.substack.com/p/do-people-really-want-to-know-the

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May 26, 2023Liked by John Botica

I can check off most of the same on your list, John. The hardest was being dumped by my husband of 32 years because he had enough of my resistance to lame authorities. His idea was to pretend to go along but don't be vocal about it. Our four children are split over who stands on the right side. However, if you know this is all a spiritual battle between good and evil, and you know how it ends, you can find peace and comfort during the temporary suffering. I'm not a religious nut but I do believe God gave us everything we need to know in the one uncopyrighted King James Bible. If you will believe that God sent his son to the earth 2000 yrs ago to reconcile us to him by the cross, he will give you understanding when you open the book. Otherwise, it remains somewhat cryptic and discredited by man. It all ends favorably for those who believe the Creator of all things in heaven and in earth.

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May 26, 2023·edited May 26, 2023Liked by John Botica

You forgot about the "It will never happen" mob. Those back handed smiling lot casting down eyes at your every piece of truth. Those same ones now who even as someone drops dead in front of them says "how did that happen....they were so young and healthy".

My frustration and unhappiness comes from the blindness of the crowd. Not just the inability to see but the downright refusal. Their unwillingness to even consider what we have been through.....(a bioweapon) and the fact it was a teaser. The big one is coming. BG Promised that. The WHO will be exercising their laws as soon as they are able after all our governments have signed away our sovereignty.

After all Deagle said 2025 and predicts a 15 million population for Australia. 99 million for USA and 14 million for UK. Thailand 65 million, Canada 26 million and NZ 3 million. Whatever is coming is going to be epic. The main losses are for westernised countries.

Will the blindsided wake up in time. Nah....don't think so.

I imagine them in their dying breathe saying "well I didn't think that would happen"!

Now can someone help me with this?

I need 2 teeth extracted and according the doctors at La Quinta Columna (the doctors who originally found the graphene oxide in shot) , the dental anaesthetics now have it in them. How can I get the job done without anaesthetics? And no I am not brave enough to put a string on the door knob and slam the door !

John you have kept your great sense of humour so not all is lost.

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May 26, 2023·edited May 26, 2023Author

Thanks. Re: the teeth…. I’m in the same situation. Maybe we can survive a bit of graphene? Yes… their dog headed refusal to acknowledge what is so clearly and blatantly obvious is infuriating beyond description!

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I jus' ordered a degausser--nutty as it sounds, I'm a gonna try to degausse my older daughter's daily insulin--no idea how ta git out the graphene but I got MAGNETS on the vial with hopes they'll draw some'a the particles ta the sides. Insane? mebbe so... but the poor kid can't live without the stuff an' I don't wanna see my own chile poisoned... If ya kin hold off on the dent-triste I'm a hopin' SOMEBUDDY will figger out how to de-fang what's in all've the vials--Dr. Ana n' others 'r workin' on it--arguably Dr Buttar was over the target 'fore he became one...

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P.S…. I did end the article with… “Well… I guess that’s some of it anyway.”

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May 26, 2023·edited May 26, 2023Liked by John Botica

You know John, I wish I didn't go down the rabbit hole so much.

Talking about Deagle again.....

Last week I was watching David DuByne of Adapt 2030 and he was showing how the temperature changes due to volcanic activity are going to affect this world. Not climate change per se but world cooling. It seems that Lebanon is going to be the centre of all activities because of a perfect climate. I am not sure if it was on the same video but I saw how there is a really massive luxurious compound being built for the elites in Lebanon. I just thought....oh yeh..... being one of those blind, as I mentioned above.

Well blow me down on checking the Deagle chart again, I find most of the countries having an increase of population have about a 10 to 11% increase max. but not Lebanon. It has a massive 59% increase in population.....the only country to do so. Why Lebanon ?

As I said going down the rabbit hole again.........

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May 26, 2023Liked by John Botica

I hear you!! And feel the same way. I'm an independent paint contractor so didn't lose the job but there have had to be workarounds for certain brainwashed clients or jobs I've said no to because the quadruple jabbed were so constantly sick I couldn't take the risk of being around their shedding. As a musician there has been great fallout; venues closing touring possibilities nullified and live shows I have not been able to attend for the very same reasons you've experienced.

I grieve for the collective. I grieve for the billions of people whose lives have been shortened or ended or harmed by this genocide. Has it been good for the songwriting? Hell yeah, that's about all it's been good for. It has no doubt deepened the spiritual practices of many in our search for peace and meaning. But it's not over. This has been a prelude. I can't think of why the globalists would stop their bid for world' domination and total enslavement of the human race when they're doing so well and it's all going according to plan. Thanks for being a voice of sanity in the wilderness, John.

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Yes, I too feel like my life has been practically ruined. I have no friends locally anymore. I am grateful I still have one friend to talk to on the phone who lives in another state. It feels like in my life it has just been one upheaval or trauma after another so much so that it’s just kind of ridiculous now. I rely on cannabis a bit too much to just block out the noise. I can only take so damn much you know. 🙄

At least making art is a solitary pleasure for me as is listening to music. I am with you in spirit.

A song new by The Liminanas called Snatcher

Great lyrics. Hope the link works.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=sKVS_GCz-a4

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Joy, Jesus is your closest friend. He will never fail and promises of protection. Give him a try.

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Thank you Arnold, that is very kind. I was raised in the southern baptist church and went to a private christian elementary school where we memorized many verses of the King James bible. I was baptized when I was 12 and take the teachings of Jesus to heart. I also feel deep affinity for the teachings of Buddha.

Many blessings to you. 🪷🙏

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Joy, the Son of God is risen from the dead, and is God and will return from the heavens soon just as He promised for those waiting. Just as God told the Hebrews to worship him alone and to dispense with other 'gods' or idols, you have no need of Buddha. The Lord give you His wisdom in this.

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May 27, 2023Liked by John Botica

Remember that movie the Matrix? How many would thank you for unplugging them? 😀

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THANK YOU! I now have an easy copy-paste to send people when I am asked why I am unhappy. I feel hope and solidarity in reading that someone else has experienced what I have, but I also feel rage and sadness in reading that someone else has experience what I have. Especially when I realize that a lot of people have a similar list to this, and yet--again as rightly pointed out here--the authoritarians continue to gaslight us, and their cultists continue to do their bidding, including constantly endeavoring to make our lives miserable.

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